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Well, I have decided to just screw it...literally! Just going to make the holes as small as possible, maybe 1/8" and find some small hex bolts and washers.
Just make sure you use stainless. You could use aluminum but they'll corrode eventually. The original bolts that came with the license plate frame I bought rusted in a like a week after I put in on. I was like WTF, they should have at least been coated bolts, if they weren't going to supply stainless.