Im thinking about buying a 96 ram 1500 and the guy said to shift into 4 hi you have to go from reverse to drive like 3 times to engage the t-case is this a major problem?

 

That's not the transfer case -- that's the Central Axle Disconnect (CAD). Whether or not it's a major problem depends upon why it's doing that. If it's a minor vacuum leak, it might be a challenge to find it but the fix is easy enough. If it's because the axle shaft and/or collar are hosed up, it's a bigger problem.

You might take a look at the factory service manual (see the FAQ/DIY section) to determine whether or not it's something you want to worry over/toy with.

 

its not a big deal.
could be worn bushings, vac leak, burrs on axle or collar. fairly common problem.

as said- not a tcase problem.
http://dodgeram.org/tech/repair/4X4/...roubleshooting

 

im guessing a broken vacuum line somewhere but wont know for sure until its solved.

 

its also got some slop in the tie rods ill probobly get some stronger than oem tie rods to help with the bigger tires any suggestions?

 

sloppy steering is another common problem. track bar, steering box, tie rods end, linkage, ball joints, etc. if you get into the linkage, look at the 2500 linkage upgrade. these parts can get damned expensive.