A PERFECT DAY FOR A MAN

6:00
Alarm.

6:15
*******.

6:30
Massive dump while
reading the sports section.

7:00
Breakfast. Filet Mignon,
eggs, toast and tea.

7:30
Limo arrives.

7:45
Bloody Mary en route to airport

8:15
Private jet to Augusta Georgia.

9:30
Limo to Augusta National Golf Club.

9:45
Play front nine at Augusta,
finish 2 under par.

11:30 *******

11:45
Lunch. 2 dozen oysters on
the half shell. 3 Heinekens.

12:15
*******.

12:30
Play back nine at Augusta,
finish 4 under par.

2:15
Limo back to airport.
Drink 2 Bombay martinis.

2:20
*******

2:30
Private jet to Nassau, Bahamas.
Nap.

3:15
Late afternoon fishing
excursion with topless female crew.

4:15
*******

4:30
Catch world record light
tackle marlin - 1249 lbs.

5:00
Jet back home. En route,
get massage from naked supermodel.

7:00
Watch Sportscenter.

7:30
Dinner. Lobster appetizers,
1963 Dom Perignon,20oz. New York strip.

9:00
Relax after dinner with 1789
Augler Cognac and Cohiba Cuban cigar.

10:00
Have sex with two
18 year old nymphomaniacs.

11:00
Massage and Jacuzzi.

11:45 Go to bed.

11:46
One last *******

11:59
Let loose a 12 second, 4 octave fart.
Watch the dog leave the room.

12:00
Laugh yourself to sleep[/align]

 

that's awsome....I love the laugh yourself to sleep part.

 

That wiil work for me except for the cow pasture pool part.

 

That is amazing. I love it.

 

I have one for a woman's perfect day but it does not quite measure up....

 

I really do belive that my wife belives that I live like this while shes gone [8D].