Actually, every state is different on this....which may be a help or a hinderance to him on this regard. More to the point, he CAN get a lawyer to get the paternity test pushed to the forefront.

You are correct that it's going to take some $$$$$ and regardless of how it turns out, he's probably still going to lose out.....unless its not his child. Also, alot of states are now setting a specific number as to how much you're required to pay with regards to the type of custody you have. For example, Texas requires you to pay 25% of your income for 1 child, 28% for 2, and I believe it's 30% for 3...

Bottom line - every state is different, and some good people get screwed, and some win big.... the key is to have all your ducks in a row, and make everyone of those ducks knockout blows. If she's in and out of jail for drug use, if she's unable to hold a job because of said drug habits, if she's neglecting the child, etc etc... these are all things that the courts will want to see. Some states are easier to fight for child support/custody then others.

Indiana, where I live, is primarily a woman's state. Women tend to get custody 8 out of 10 times, regardless if they are a good mother, make more money, etc.... which to me....is complete bull****. How does any of that make any sense? If the father is more financially stable, good living enviroment, good job, and is just as physically able/willing to take care of his child as the mother, why should she automatically get custody.... she shouldnt.

Hopefully, this is not the case for you.

 

Sorry to hear such. You need to find a lawyer ASAP (good ones are not cheap) then you need to give him the above info to show that she has not wanted you to know if the child is yours. Also let him know that she has skipped from one state to the next to avoid a paternity test and that the paternity test is why she skipped from one state to the next. The more you can make her look bad the better off it may be for you in the long run. I'm not sure about the laws in MT but if she was ever move to WA or CA you would be screwed.

Good Luck.

 

I just saw this part of your response when I read DBLR's post... and it's something that you seriously need to get in writing, if you dont already have....and submit it to a lawyer/court. Note the section in bold in your quote..

Why would this be important? Because if she moved just to stay on welfare, then she's abusing the system and could force her to lose them regardless. A lawyer could give you better answers then any of us.... but man.... I'd definitely try to get that crap in writing if its available. Also, let's say that was in 2003....why did she wait until 2008 to do this again? The courts will not like seeing that from her.... regardless of what they decide on...and may go easier on you.

Also, since you were trying to get paternity established in Wyoming, you might be able to use Wyoming to force her to get a paternity test before Montana can force you to do anything, since she essentially didnt comply with the state's orders. Not really sure of this, but I do know that things like this do happen.

Also, I will add that regardless of how this turns out, I would push for strict guidelines on where she can move/live with your child. My friend's ex-wife cant even leave the county with his child. Stay on top of it too, cuz if she's essentially floating from address to address....you can make the courts hell for her.

 

Wow, this just sucks. You do have some good on your side though. Child support is a federal thing and is regulated the same in ALL states. Just how it happens is by state to state. The things that you got going for you is that you did try to contact her for years once you got back. Hope you have any kind of records on that for proof. Another thing is that since she fled after the request of the paternity test, she technically kidnapped your daughter if she is yours by crossing state line and not letting you know. One big thing you got going for you is that if the girl is yours and she wants child support, since she left without your knowledge and with no contact, you can request that she moves back to your area for visitation, sue for custodyyourself, or you can relinquish any parental rights that you may have, and not pay child support. A lawyer will be abl to more incite on that though.

Now to get a lawyer is going to cost you. You might be lucky and find an attorney that will start with a retainer around $5000. The good news, if your ex does not have the money for a lawyer, she will have to settle for defending herself in family court which by the looks of it, will cost her bigtime. More good news, a lawyer may be able to snip this in the bud with a simple letter and phone call to her district and then you will get most of your retainer back. Now if you want to know if the girl is yours, and you want custody and/or visitation, then you can count on your retainer and then some being spent. It is all up to you.

Quick story, a freind of mine here in Miami got divorced and had 2 little boys. He spent roughly $55k on proving that he was the better parent and got custody and child support in his favor. The reason he won.....he could afford an attorney and she had to defend herself. The lawyer ate her up. Now there was nothing wrong with the mother other than she had a temper, but when push comes to shove, our great US laws SUCKand if you don;t have somebody to speak it, you will lose.

Good luck on what ever decision you choose and I hope you get what you want.

 

Thanks for all the help on this guys. Sucks that so many of you have been through it, but it really makes me feel like I stand a chance on this. I think that I do still have documentation on some of this. When I got deployed, about 95% of my stuff got "destroyed" by my roommate at the time (Pawned I'm sure) so all I have left is a few things. Hope it's in there. If not, hopefully CSS has the records. Again, thanks for the support.

 

Sorry to here about this!!!!
I used to live in Casper and know an Attorney I could refer you to. They may not be able to help you but could probably point you to someone who can.

PM me if you want the name and number.

 

I know a lawyer here in MT that is a vicious son of bastich. He charges plenty but men win with him. It's a long way to come to Glendive to meet with him but I guess if you don't have any other options dude.

 

hey dirtydodge02..

well i know im a gasser as you diesel guys call em, lol. but i read the diesel section alot because i dream of owning a truck like the ones you guys have when im older.

anyways i read your story and i hope everything works out for you...but heres a little on my story.

im 16 yrs old and my mom left my dad when he was on a business trip when i was 1.5 yrs old because he was abusive and other complications. He went 12 yrs without even trying to contact me or my mom and as of about 2 years ago, he filed a court petition to get visitation rights back. well me knowing that he was abusive and stuff, i want nothing to do with anything he has to offer me, but he keeps insisting that i need to talk to him and live with him.

sorry for the rant and i know your situation is different but i wanted to tell you this so you get a childs persepective on the whole thing. my dad never paid child support in the 12 yrs he didnt have contact with me and he owes over 25,000 to my mom that he is somehow getting away without paying. again i hope your situation works out.

Nick

 

ur x wife is what I like to call an epic failure at life

 

Hey TruckDude!

He owes you that money! That is my perspective on most cases of child support. It is provided to give you a better standard of living and what I like to see is something like a trust set up for you to go to college. I agree with your decision regarding his abusive nature. What would've changed?