To tell the truth I didn't have it mashed all the way to the floor. Damn Greenpeace people keep squeakin' at me about longer days meltin' the icecaps or some such nonsense. Damndest liars I ever seen.
I promised 'em I'd gas it facin' west ever so often just to keep things straight, 'cause the wife gets tired of 'em protestin' in front the house.

 

Seen yer biceps back at the first of the year when I brought you them parts. Unless you been shootin' steroids them biceps wouldn't light a flashlight. More like a lightnin' bug. And the only time I ever scream in fear is when the Wife is drivin'.

 

see, the problem is that you let the wife drive at all. i mean, you ride shotgun with the old lady at wheel? and you attack another guys manliness? really?

the only time my girl is behind the wheel and on the same 4 wheels as me is when i have to load her broken down wreck of a VW into my truckbed with her in driver's seat.

i shouldnt have to point out, that this doubles at drawing attention to my trucks incredible power, though admittedly in this case laoding a VW is like loading a little flek of dandruff onto an oil barge. But usually the oil barge is in tow (i fabricated a custom hitch for that purpose by eating small animals fed a diet of jalapenos and smaller animals like firebugs and welding with my farts) so i suppose it doesnt matter.

 

LMAO!! That's because you've never had to eat my cookin'. Ever heard the term don't **** off the cook? Gotta let her drive ever couple of years or so or there's no livin' with her. Get's plumb testy about it. An' it probably takes a barge to keep oil in yore smokin' heap.

 

All that working on my truck the last year has built my biceps somewhat. And speakin of that, when you gonna make another trip down here? The old girl looks alot different than last time you saw her. And I know a really good mudhole we could test your heap o junk in. You just might not recognize the area now that Ike paid a visit. I dont even recognize most of it.

 

Not sure about that trip down. Going to that part of the country usually requires a visit with my mother in law. Picture Mimi from the Drew Cary show. Brrr, get the ******* just thinkin' about it. Might be worth it to show you up though. An when your 'ol rag blows up tryin' to keep up with my truck it'll level whatever trees and houses Ike didn't get. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F9u-M...eature=related

 

ROFLMAO! Where the hell did you find that video? That`s what it looks like when I`m makin` love. I think every guy says that about his mother in law. I wouldn`t know from experience, I am staying a swining bachelor. Besides, my truck can pull that hunk o scrap you call a truck backerds and uphill while driving into the wind. I don`t even need power steering. I`m only runnin` a 32" tire, but that should be enough. I just might need a new windshield first. That one is spiderwebbed to death. It might crack appart under the stress.

 

A SWINING bachelor?! Hope ta hell you mean fat gals not pigs. And you were givin' me hell about the whole diamond in the goat's *** deal. If that's what it looks like when yer doin' one 'o them swines you better lay off them beans and after sex cigarettes.

An' yore Beverly Hillbillies lookin' jalopy couldn't drag my truck down a cliff with 10 fat gals ridin' shotgun for extra weight.

 

Nothin` wrong with fat chicks, just that much more to hold on to . And as I recall, I wasn`t the one wanting to glue a 3kt diamond in a goats butt with preperation H. That is wrong on so many levels. And it`s hard to beat a pot of red beans with a chunk of fat back thrown in. Put `em over some rice with a little hot sauce. Good eatin`. But I don`t smoke. The only thing that smokes is your truck. Especially when you burn it up trying to pull my superior machine. Wait till I put the Edelbrock and Mopar Performance stickers on. Cause any kid with an import will tell you, stickers are good for at least 50HP. LOL. And I will have you know that I have always found it impossible to light up a fart. I have tried many times, all you do is burn your *** with the lighter. And I was younger then.

 

Them stickers would better serve as bandaids for patchin' the rust holes an' split seats on that fender flappin' heap o yores.