i'm thinking that your internal combustion engine has evolved to an external combustion engine. so you need to pour gasoline on the outside of the motor. you'll also need to remove the spark plugs from the inside of the motor and remount them on the outside.

do all this and then try to start it.

it should fire right up.

 

Yep, that should make a nice fire. Be sure to get pictures!

 

if don't want to run, time to teach her to fly. that way you save your tires

 

since your truck won't run, or walk, or fly, there's only one thing left - teach it to dance.

 

I'm surprised how far away from the basics we have gone..
Page 14 and no one has mentioned the "key trick"?
Procedure is as follows

Put key into ignition
Turn to on (not start)
turn off
repeat this 2 more times
get out of truck
run around 2 and 3/4 times in a clockwise direction
climb back in through sliding rear window (Note if you have a solid rear window you will have to remove it)
make your way to the drivers seat
note orientation of key
remove from ignition and flip it over
put back in ignition and turn it and see if it starts.
Thats it....
Those keys only work one direction on trucks with green paint.
The key trick resets the dingle arm interlock, and renders the key colorblind.

I need to add make sure you do this procedure in ignition NOT the passenger side air bag key switch, doing so will cause your plenum to leak.

 

have you tried scanning your truck?
i'm sure this will help.

here's three very good scanners.

 

MY truck still won't run. I talked to a guy who used to be neighbors with this other guy who had a nephew who is a mechanic three counties over. Anyway, this guy I talked to said it might be my battery. I figure he knows what he's talking about but thought I should ask a forum full of strangers who can't see or touch my truck what their opinion is. Could he be correct?

 

I still think its a lack of hookers and blow that is causing the problem.

EDIT:
Reminds me of cheat codes on the old Nintendo video game consoles.

 

i had a truck a long time ago that had a stock battery. i took it to a mechanic and had it replaced with a high performance battery. i also had him to install a K&N sticker on the inside of the tool box. it increased my horsepower but caused the engine to stall at red lights so i took the truck to another mechanic and had the sticker removed.

this information should help you fix your truck.

 

Almost two months later and this thing still doesn't run. I'm stumped.